Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Jumping jackholes in Gary's boots.

A lot has happened in the last two week.... A LOT!

April 1st. Gary the ball player was told that he had to hit as hard a possible come his turn out of the dug-out. Gary stepped up to play but Gary noticed his bat was all wrong. Gary told himself long ago he was not gonna hit no more with this bat. Gary gave a struck out and went back to the dug-out. Dave was infuriated and demanded an explanation. Gary said his bat was all wrong and he stood by what he believed in; hit as hard as you can with what you know is right. Dave then told Matt that something needed to be done with the press, they will need an answer especially with that nosy reporter Susan. Matt stood in the press conference room and told a lie, Matt told that Gary had suffered from an eye infection that made him misjudge the throws. Later that evening Gary was sent for an ethics counseling. While sitting in that room Gary remembered lines that rang out, integrity, honesty, snitch, sell-out, leadership, a ship of sea-going rats...

Gary stood up in session and asked the counselor; "Isn't that being prejudice?"
Gary left for home without an answer and knew, he was on a ship of sea-going rats...

April 8th. After Gary had rolled around in the left over spaghetti long enough, that night Gary decided that Italian food is not his thing. Gary gave his notice to Alessandro and told him that he will no longer be dinning at table number 23 no more. Though the waitress Latifah, who so fondly waited on Gary (God bless her soul) had nipples that Gary wanted to suck on for years to come but all things come to an end! Like they say in Greek; all women get fat and start beating up their husbands one day...

April 10th. Gary went to the tracks to watch the Indy500 with Rebbecca and Nancy. He met good old Dan, boy was Gary glad to see him after all these years. Gary and Dan grew up in New Mexico, stealing chicken for a living at 10. They were both busted and thrown in the slammer for 8 years. Gary got out on good behavior in 5 but Dan, the fast mouth wanker he was got him into more trouble with Warden Stevenson. Stevenson hated the fact that Gary was set free by the state committee. That night Gary and Dan danced like it was old times. They had hotdogs and beers and smelled gasoline zoom pass them like it was 1999 all over again. To beat the night all up into one batter of sweet tasting icing, Dale Earnhart stole the flag on the last corner of the last lap! Brilliant!

April 11th. Gary picked his bat up again. It fell so right in his hands, the balance, the swing, the texture on the surface sliding in and out of his palms was finally right tonight... Gary just knew he was going hit an all time record that night. And just as Gary predicted, he did! Gary made that stadium his home. He went home knowing his every swing was swung with the purest of earnest emotions and Gary harvested what he could that night to what might be his best play ever... Gary even fell in love with Amanda that night! Gary went home but left Amanda out of the picture and never turned back...

April 14th. Gary is troubled... He needs to bat again, he knows that for a long time coming now, that he won't get to bat until he can learn to crawl again. Gary is a stubborn person. Gary's not one to be the first to admit it but he knows. Till the day comes that Gary breaks his own, Gary will not bat again. Neither will he see Amanda again...

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