i think i've become an antisocial. not only am i lazy to get out of the house but i've actually lost the interest to go out and meet people. its really weird when all i wanted to do when i was away for so long was to meet up with friends and family. but now i don't even feel like driving to Bangsar to see Ricardo. i used to love to drive, everywhere my friends wanted to go, i was the first one there. WK used to be suprised at how fast i could get to his house, but now i'm like a slug with fractured foot.
i hope i don't turn into a communist either...
cause i'm starting to hate company too, see my dad's errm..i think she is my dad's cousin or WTF not like i care. back to the story, see she's been staying here for a few days now, i haven't even spoken a word to her, nor do i even know her name. and quite frankly i just completely hate strangers. then today my dad's sister comes by, she's gonna be here till friday. GGGGGGGod i'm turning into my brother. he hates everyone. i used to be the smile at everyone, welcome faced guy. well thats a big lie, i've been known as the stuck up too, cause i apparently have the look of an SOB. see i don't know my dad's sister or his cousin, they could be the two most gentle women in the whole wide world, and i'm not one to judge but i've become like a nutty professor, going into my cavern (room) and spend the rest of the days there. you know i've removed the bed from my room. i've stored it under my parents bed, so now all my room has is a few cabinets, my closet, my study table and my computer table...
i wanted to lie down the other day, then i realzed i have to do that on the floor. and its weird that since i stop sleeping on my bed, i've never wanted to lie down in my room. my uncle is coming down on saturday, my cousin is leaving for the UK in september, they'll be here to do up her visa. i hope i don't turn into a complete jerk when they arrive. her moms my favorite aunty, she takes really good care of me when i go to Penang. i'd hate to make her feel horrible that she came. now if i can only manage to crack down on this moods in get into, if i can find the switch and somehow manage to turn it off, i know i'd be a whole better person. i was thinking of going back with her to Penang when she leaves, maybe its cause i haven't had a vacation in a long time, maybe thats why i am like Oscar the guy who lives in the trash can in Sesame Street.
later
1 comment:
You are probably experiencing withdrawal symptoms of trying to get back into the Malaysian mode.
For an entire year you were away and growing and experiencing things while your memories of KL/Malaysia were frozen at the time you left. To put yourself back in the picture while everyone at home has gone and gain new experiences as well (without you in the picture), is as though you went from Point A to D bypassing B and C which is rather disconcerting. Give it time and get into a routine (not your current one) and your mind/body/soul will adjust.
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