I Thought I Wanted A Career...

Turns out, I was only interested in a paycheck. The story of my life!

There has to be something more out there than just the constant climb of the economic ladder. I want to believe that, but sadly I see no other alternative... I mean from the day you're a kid, the one constant factor that motivates you to become someone (whether it's hidden or in your face) is money. True? I mean have you met an 8 year old who took a trash can to school for show and tell; "When I grow up, I want to be the rubbish collector......"

Not that I'm looking down at the guy who empties my trash can. Hey, without him/her we'd stink up the neighborhood. But let's face it, he/she isn't exactly making anyone jealous with his/her career choice. The last time I had this conversation was about 10 years ago with my college career counselor and it ended with him saying; "There is a lot of money in the trash business..!"

Here is to me, learning how to get rid of my own trash....

No Sharp Objects Allowed

You can't live like an idiot forever. You're bound to smell your own fart, eventually!

MEEEEOOOOWWW.....

You know what's the worst thing that can happen to a guy? Getting caught in the middle of two F E M A L E S (Stressing the point about females)!

May it be two sisters, two colleagues, two toilet scrubbers, two bff's, two whatevers! If there are two of the same kind, get to know one and don't even bother to find out the name of the other. That's the best advice I can give any man out there...

Why do women feel that you have to take sides to be ON THEIR side? Just because I sit silently on the red corner, doesn't mean I'm cheering for the blue team, or vice-versa! This sisterhood thing is really a piece of crap I tell you. Once a month, they'll all band together around a fire and chant 'Men are bastards' two minutes later they'll be back stabbing on another over the same fire. And then they'll go around trying to recruit minions, and 90% of the time, it'll be us men. Whom, I have to admit la... We're quite stupid to hear them out in the first place. The next time a woman comes up to me and speaks about another woman, I.D.G.A.R.A.

For the last two years or so, I've befriended a lot of women and I'm sick and tired of being in the crossfire. This is warning to all those out there with make-up on, I'm am armed and trigger happy, if I hear so much as a peep about anyone of you trying to put me in between all your cat squabble. KABOOM...!

kapish? End of discussion, period!!!!!

p.s; My loyalties will always be offered to the one I refer to as, Honey!

"Bye honey..."

How often do you hang out in front of your office in the mornings? Try this, go in early tomorrow and just stand and observe outside of your office building. Going in early to office has it perks, I get to 'conduct' sociology experiments (hehe!).

There is a huge majority of couples who carpool, and gosh, the antics they pull in the cabin while saying goodbye. Some are hilarious, some makes you go 'aaaawwww..' and some tells you to stay away from that person today. The couples who ride a motorcycle are the most affectionate to one another when they drop each other off. Well I didn't expect it but those who came in huge ass luxury cars, hardly say a word much less even give a wave 'tschuss'. I saw a couple play rock, paper, scissors; winner gets a kiss! I saw one couple wrestle each other and another couple synchronizing their pda's. Why, only God knows!

The obvious is that they didn't get enough of each other the night before. I say that's a thumbs up for our community today! Divorce rates are at it's highest but who knows, I see signs it may come down...

Butterscotch Baby

Come this October, my little (okay, not so little) munchkin will turn 5. It has dawned on me that 5, is actually 40 in dog years....

I've noticed as of late that she is already starting to find it difficult to run up and down the stairs. Also after she gets up from her slumber, her hind legs are a little shaky. And it struck a deep and sad cord in me.

For the past 5 years of my adult life, this woman has been a huge part of it. She's seen me get my first job. Buy my first car (which technically was for her). She's seen not one but a few 'ladies' come and go in my life. She's even stood by side in a 'show-down' with 6 teenage rempits. She's been there! And you know what saddens me the most when I think about this situation, even if I would never acknowledge her or thank her for being there; I know she'll still do it, again and again. Dog's have thought me the true meaning of unconditional love.

Baby isn't my first dog, but she's the most significant one ever. I'm quite aware of a dog's lifespan, much more that of a German Shepherd. I know I will out live her but I also know that someday my Butterscotch furred friend and I will run the out fields again, together!

Financial Freedom

The two most important words I've heard in the last 30years! I'll be the first to admit, I'm a late bloomer to understanding the concept. Or should I say instead, the one who held out the longest before being lured into the darkside!

From the 80s' people have been on this rat race while I've been pissing my best years away. No regrets though, I've lived a full life. I've survived thus far and somewhere inside of me there's a voice that is telling me this path is just going to be another one of Rajesvaran Santhana's crazy adventures...

What can I say, trying to achieve this financial freedom is a bitch! Recently I've started up my own business and I've gained a new found respect for everyone who have in the past started up their own businesses. I've never been more excited in my life, yet never shit more bricks in my life as yet too.

Battling the unknown with the least amount of experience. No matter how thorough you are in coming up with business plans and marketing strategies, there is just no preparing you for this!

Wish me luck....

It Will Never Happen

Ever since I made it public that Nigella Lawson is on my list. I've had a band of people telling me how it will never happen... People, people, people; the idea is not for it TO happen but IF it were to happen. The most common reason I've been given is that she's old enough to be my mother. Oh come on... Age is just a number. And if anyone looked so good at her age, I think it's a compliment younger men are lusting over her!

The flirtation idea of hooking up with a celebrity IS fictional; I mean, we all know the odds are closer to never. But from now and then everyone melts into a little infatuation with people we see on television. There was a whole show about this on the Discovery Channel. How the human mind identifies with famous faces and how we get attracted to that symmetry. Yes, infatuation has it math too.

Put the math aside, have you guys watched her shows? That woman only cooks sexy food! I don't know if it's the setting or the way the production crew zooms into her and her kitchen. Let's just say it's more sex than food. I'm not ashamed to say, watching her cook up something and take a bite into it, gives me a hard on... Another thing I notice about her show; the focus is on her. So that means the producers know, SHE is the one raking in the viewers and not her dishes! Have you seen how they focus in on her mouth as she take a spoon full of creamy spaghetti?

Grow Up and Smell The Coffee...

And no, I'm not hosting another talk show! Karan is a fag!

It has been brought to my attention that I've not grown up yet....

Now somehow I know I shouldn't dismiss this by saying; boys will be boys. The measure of a man is what? Boy that is a very subjective question. Many could say the same about success. So what is it about me that makes me still a kid? I runaway from my responsibilities? I don't seem to have the 'Dark Knight, weight on my shoulders' grim face? Or is it that I seem to want to associate everything I do with fun?

I know, an alarm went off somewhere for the latter... Now what's wrong with trying to make everything a little more fun? Wouldn't it be a whole lot easier doing a chore if it was fun to do it? We wouldn't call a chore to start with then...!

"A rolling stone gathers no moss..."

Now a lot times, this saying goes synonymous with people who seem to evade his or her responsibilities. A nomad who can't seem to commit to something or someone. But here is how I see it. A savior who knows, when his job here is done and moves on to his next challenge. Moss is symbolic to idling in my opinion. Hence why the Stones must Roll and Rock never dies!

Who's going for the Slash concert?

2010... OMG, I'm 10 years older from Y2k!

Becoming 30 sucks...

It's like suddenly all the hair on your head just declared war with the rest of your body. All troops from the head have been deployed south! I have hair growing on my back, I can pass off as a Sasquatch! I even have hair growing on my ears! Now that's one thing God (the all mighty creator) clearly fucked up on. Seriously, hair on men's ears proves one thing; God had too much time on his/her hands! If that's not enough I just developed a new condition called Alopecia Barbae. It's when spots of my facial hair decide that they too want to join the head hair on they crusade down south! So now, my head is thinning, my forehead is getting bigger and I have bald spots on my beard! Just shoot me....

My list of five...

Every man has a list... And here is mine;

1. Nigella Lawson
2. Carrie Ann Moss
3. Elizabeth Shue
4. Julia Roberts
5. Anushka Shetty

Thus far...

Can you believe it, it's already February. It was like 2009 just a few months ago, then it was 2010 and now it's a month since 2010...! Every year, you routinely look forward to certain things that happen, I mean for me it's the annual gathering at grandma's at the year end (my start to the year starts in December). Then it's Thaipusam in Penang. And then there's the March till May of wondering where is this year heading. Now this period usually ends with a crazy pack your bags and head to some island where we chug beer and chow prawns like there's no tomorrow...

Then when I usually get back from where ever it is I just got back from, it's the Jun and July period. Now this is the actually period I'm good at everything I do. I peak at work. I start dreaming of that big promotion, that filthy increment and that corner office where the sun set is awesome! Come August, 9 times out of 10 I would have had my blood sucked dry the corporation lies and bullshit. So August is usually the month where I update my resume. And not to rub it in, I'll be sulking in the all golden era of wrinkles! Yes, it's the month I turn a year older. And the words my dad said to me when I turned 20 keeps ringing in my ear; "You're 20, and what do you have to show for it?".

Oh then comes the crazy September where I start making enemies at work, I start smoothly making friends with the 'other' side. I remember one September I even drove 300miles to another interview just cause I was pissed with the boss. I have to say that was weird interview, we spent 2 hours bitching about the government in dingy Pizzahut at PTP, oh and my ex throwing a scene in a club that night took the cake!

Wait! (Drum roll please...): OCTOBER! Wooooo hhhhooooooo....!!! (nuff said).

We then come to a stand still at November, where everything starts to make sense and the world seems like a better place. We mellow down from all the ruff and tuff of May till September. We start saying things like; "Who ever said life was easy?", "When the going gets tough....." and saving the best for last; "It wasn't meant to be...".

Then it comes back to December, one full cycle... Circle... Whatever! Point is, is 2010 going to be any different? Time will tell...

Oh and I'm goooooooddd...

Have you ever stopped to wonder if you're good at anything? No I'm serious, are you good at anything at all and if you knew it would you say it? I mean, on a daily business scheme of things, we go about doing maybe a thousand things? Let's stop and make a list... Also let's see if we can say, we're good at any of these things?

1. Set the alarm
2. Turn it on
3. Go to bed
4. Pretend to go to bed
5. Pretend to pretend to go to bed

Okay I'm rambling... Onto more serious stuff

1. A hand shake
2. The take control of the room walk (When you walk into the room, you know?)
3. Kissing... (!!!)
4. Driving
5. Knowing which wine to pick
6. Make a kid laugh
7. At what you do at work
8. Play the game (You know)

I know a few people who are good at a few things, like my brother, he is good at computers. My best friend, he is good at gadgets. My girlfriend good with the monetary stuff. My mom, good in the kitchen. My boss, good on a spread sheet. Makes you wonder are you good at anything...

A little bit of giving back...

Just what this country needs right about now...

I recently saw a group on Facebook that supported the use of 'Macha' as the official Malaysian calling. Like the Americans have their 'Dude' and the British have their 'Mate'... But what inspired me the most was a comment left in there by one of the members and it went;

'One Malaysia is nonsense, One Macha is more likely to happen!'

With that in mind I must say, I've thus far started off 2010 with little glitter of hope for this world we live in. I once wrote;

'The cries of great men, for the freedom of a nation and for acknowledgment of individualism. For who and what they are. No more, no less. Not for a claim, nor for approval. This simple truth has been the elementary drive of these men and their existence...'

And what little we do, can spiral into heart warming climates (if not Tsunami's of a good nature). Over the weekend a few great men ('mankind', wouldn't wanna offend the extraordinary women who came too) tried to change the climate for a few people who needed some wind of change in their lives.



The children of Rita Home in Kapar.... Adorable brats!



The Toilet Roll Mummy... Just one of the games we played...



These kids had some hilarious stories to tell us and they were quite the story tellers!

Hats off to all those who came and I wanna give a shout-out to a special someone who spearheaded this event. You snowballed this, so take a bow, you're one of a kind...

You're the closest to heaven, I'll ever get...

If I went screaming 'love love love...' in the pouring rain would someone stop me and bitch slap me? Aside from the probability of getting run down by a rempit I don't think anyone would or should for that matter... I've had my heart broken so many times, I think I've lost count but not lost hope...

Yeah, yeah... I'm a hopeful romantic!

Now, I also know I'm a realist too. So how does this work? A realist knows that everything (and these are the words of a realist, not mine), everything comes to an end. It's the theory of evolution, one cycle has to end in order for the next to begin. But a hopeful goes on and on like that Celine Dion woman (and don't get me started on that song)...

I've often also said, that everything I've learned in life I've learned from Formula One. Yeah those non F1 followers will have trouble following these next few theories;

1. Qualifying position doesn't really matter on the starting grid if your strategy is sound...
2. Your win doesn't really matter, cause it's the points that at the end of the season that counts!

and lastly

3. Its one thing to catch up the to the race leader but whole different story to go pass...

(All of the above is void in the presence of R A I N)

Okay, now let's put all three genre into motion here; the realist is saying don't go for it, cause it's not really worth the long run. The hopeful in back-draft is saying fall like you've never fall before, cause it's not worth it at all if you don't. And the F1 theories only tell me one thing, fall like Senna or race away like Schumacher...

Twenty Ten

So gone it has that wretched 2009... How do I see it? Is it the year I've lost or gained? If it is one of those years I figure I've lost more than any, then it goes without saying; every year we lose our youth (and hair for men)... And this year it's major.. No, no... Major, major! Yup the big three o...

I look back to 2009 and I notice one thing; I lost a lot of possessions! Cars, phones, shoes, clothings and it didn't stop there, 2009 even manage to take away my camera at the 11th hour. Hmmm... The thing that has expanded exponentially is probably my friends list, good trade off? Time will tell!

Revival...

As I look for a revival in my blogging habits, I look around to see what other revivals are out there worth talking about. One that comes to mind; Michael Schumacher's Formula One career. Is it all talk and probably not going to happen? I don't know, my name isn't Coreena! I'm a huge fan and even that is putting it lightly but do I really want to see him come back and finish 6th or 7th, race after race? Or watch him drive into the side-pods of his position contender? Is the Michael-Magic still there for this talented rain maestro to comeback to the racing circuits for one more season?

I dunno....

The revival of my diet program! Recently I went and got a full blood test and well let's just say the number didn't exactly paint a healthy story. I have to now watch what I eat and try (and I mean, really T R Y) to break a sweat here and there. Speaking of eat, or just plain simple consumables, the drinking isn't something that's on my corner either... LOL!

I dunno....

The revival of my last year's New Year's Resolution (wait, did I even I have?). Oh yes, I did have one (O N E !); "I wanna be happy at what I do for a living". To be quite frank that ideology hasn't really been too helpful to me this year when it has come to the decisions I have made concerning my career. Then again, I've been quite happy AFTER I made them, the whole 3 seconds I've had before reality kicked in. So technically this portion doesn't need a revival but some watering down!

I dunno....

All I know right now is that my blog has a chance of revival and it's that time of the year so here is to the holidays; Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Evolution gone bad....

We're canning WOMEN now? What's next? Chopping off people's limbs? Stoning people in open market areas? Why not trade slaves? Or carry guns, walk into pubs and say 'Go ahead, make my day!"

Let the good times roll... (Wait, what's that again?)

Here is something I just came to realize; I can never sleep or go to bed with my back facing an open space or a doorway leading to another room. I guess everyone would have some crazy thing that they could do or couldn't do... What I can't figure out is why?

1. Am I afraid of being snuck up from behind?
2. Do I feel safer with my back against solidification?
3. Growing up, till I was 5 I slept with Mommy and she always had my back. Maybe I miss that?
4. My beds have always had one solid corner?
5. I prefer to sleep flat on my back with bolstered by the side?
6. I'm just a weirdo....

Is it just me, or is Anne Hathaway bloody gorgeous?! Damn... I almost ripped my boxers watching Get Smart earlier.


Speaking of Hollywood;
It has been awhile since I've gotten the opportunity to watch a really good horror flick. (I just typed porno flick by accident, or maybe sub-consciously I wanted to say that... Maybe it's the overload of Anne!). So horror, flick... Any recommendations? Do you realize at the turn of the new millennium, there hasn't been a decent Hollywood horror movie. The Koreans and Thai have taken the driving seat on this one. Maybe the westerner have just ran out of shivery stories. As to the Asian are just starting to tell the stories. I remember one of my uncles when I was younger, he used to have THE most scariest ghost stories to tell. Loved it but couldn't sleep at night afterward. Maybe that's where the insomnia started, hmmmm.....

My back is not completely healed. At the start of this week, I've felt it chink here and there. Then if I'm on the computer long enough, it starts to act up. Bloody hell, I use to heal faster than this. Being 29 and all I guess I'm just running out of healing juice! Speaking of 29, the guys pulled a really fast one on me recently. I was completely blown away... You know who you are, thanks! And to T-Mus, I swear I'll get back at you! Yes, the game is definitely on!


Yes, the chocolate plat does say Bulat and yes it is Alexis' Tiramisu...

Welcome back!!!

You know the Lila chick (Malin Akerman) from The Heartbreak Kid, OMFG (revelation time...), She's number3!

Oh yeah it's good to be back on the keyboard punching away...!

First up, I HATE PENANG. Yeah, that's another revelation. I always knew Penang had to be kept at the devils reach when it came to me. I have to make it a point never to come work in this place. A weekend getaway, Penang is perfect... A monthly paycheque, NNNOOOOOO...! I'm fed to the brim with Nasi Kandar. Sadly to admit, the devils food is never too much to say enough! The one thing I just can't get enough off, besides carbs and spices; shots on the beach! Bring it on!

(Hmmm.. I keep reaching for the exclamation mark, lately..)

As of late, my heads been pounding away on a few things I've been stuck with... Mainly my job. Do I really want to this for the rest of my life? You know, that sorta questions. Come to think of it, this question has been on my mind since early 2008! I love to write and a lot of people (friends) who've read my writing think I should continue to write but I'm still sceptical about this whole thing. I need to really put my head down and actually finish a piece and get sent it to somebody who knows more about these things. I gotta... Or else I'll be stuck in this rut for years to come!

Have you guys heard about how alcohol cannot be sold anymore in convenient stores? For crying out loud people! No one told them to go buy it or handle it. And besides its contained in cans and bottles so what's the big deal? The further evolution takes, the greater technological advances get, sometimes I feel the stupider people are getting. It's like they've made a choice to go back to the dark ages. They want to live in caves? I don't get it, grow up and move on with evolution... You have choices in life, you make them but don't force it upon others. Don't make it into rules where it affects others... that's just plain idiocy!

Time for the sad news; Salma and McKayla are no longer mine... Yup they're off to new husbands!

Two more weddings to go this year and I think hopefully that'll be all for 2009! Not as bad as 2007 or 2008. Man or man... Monthly affair of weddings. Oh well that all points to the fact, we're all not geting any younger! Cheers!

...Dum dee dum!

Let's see now, I'm so bloody free these days but I have ignored my blog? Hmmmm....

Hey bloggie, did you know I quit my job?